Never Alone

I was having coffee with a sweet friend the other day and I started recognizing a trend in many of my chats with first responders/military spouses. Almost all of us have ‘that story’. The one where you are newly married, or new to the career as a family, and it’s your first time recognizing the call and sacrifice of the job. They say they will call you when they know more information but hours, sometimes days go by without word. No call, no text, no email. You check your phone EVERY 5 minutes thinking maybe you just missed their attempt to reach out while you sit at home, alone in your thoughts and wonder if/when they are coming home. Hours pass without communication and you immediately start snowballing into a mess of thoughts. Why haven’t they called? Why is it taking so long for them to come home? What were they doing? Will I ever get to see them again? What were the last words we said to each other? The list goes on, but I believe that God takes us through this test as a family for a very specific purpose. He is laying out the foundation for us as a spouse to remember, our first responders/soldier was never ours to begin with. 

In our vows we often mention the words “our spouse is a gift from God” but less often do we really sink into what that actually means.  God wants to be our full portion and everything we need through all of life’s highs and lows. When we get married we vow to share that with our spouse and we lean into them for comfort and support in the hardest of times. We look to them for the greatest of laughs and memories we hope to share. They are our best friends and God calls us to be one with them. Even scripture tells us in Ecclesiastes 4:12

And though a man might prevail against one who is alone, two will withstand him—a threefold cord is not quickly broken.

 The promise is that God strengthens what is woven together in Him. But in order to be woven with Him we must solely rest in Him. Very easily we can take what was intended to be a gift and find our identity wrapped in our spouse. We turn our spouse into our God rather than fully surrendering them to Him.

 The risk of the job is real. I think what God is teaching us through the testing is that He must be our everything. Our spouse is simply a gift in this life. It elevates the life we get to live but our spouse can’t be our everything. God wants to be our full portion and the peace in our lives through every storm. He wants us to know when we’re on the boat, and the storm is raging, He is with us and in an instance He can calm the sea and the storms. Our spouse is the BEST gift, next to salvation, He offers us, but we must steward it well. The only way to do that is to surrender them completely to God. We can not worry for the ‘what if’ and ‘what happens when.’  We must seek the peace that surpasses all understanding and treasure the gift of time God has given us as a family. 

That doesn’t mean evil is not in this world or that every one of our spouses will always be safe. It does mean if we were to experience the unimaginable, we still rest in a good God who promises to walk with us through the darkest of seasons. This is the same God who brings beauty from ashes. He always prevails even if darkness tries to overcome us. So we must face each tone we hear on the scanner or phone call received at midnight that they will leave in 24 hours, with trust, believing whatever the Story God has written for us, it’s a good one. One that serves to bring Him the most glory so that others may come to know Him. We must first posture our hearts in surrender and in gratitude for the incredible, sometimes challenging ;), gift that is our spouse. They are not ours to begin with. God’s love for them is FAR greater than anything we could ever experience for them. Our spouse was God’s child long before they ever became our spouse. So if you have yet to walk through that season of questioning, or like me find yourself giving into the anxieties as they rear their ugly head yet again, hold on to these truths with everything you have. God is and should be our everything. Our spouse is a gift from God and was God’s child long before they became our spouse. *Everything* was created to give God glory and we must live that out in every aspect and season of our life. 

Want to know the comical story where I felt thrown into the deep end to this realization? Stay tuned 😉 I’ll post that for a mid-week pick me up!